1 Timothy 3 - NL - Quite a measuring stick!

Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect. 1 Timothy 3:2-4

These guidelines that Paul gives to Timothy for choosing church overseers are a good guideline for measuring our lives against. It shows us where we have areas to grow in and where God has grown and changed us. It is quite an imposing list!

• Above reproach - reproach is bringing shame or rebuke so being above reproach is living in such a way that people have nothing to accuse you of doing wrong. That is quite a high bar!
• Faithful to his wife - certainly an important area in this age when divorce and unfaithfulness are common. It demonstrates a commitment to loving another in practical ways even through hard times. 
• Temperate - Showing moderation or self restraint - commonly in areas of food and drink. Not giving into eating too much, drinking too much or excess in general.
• Self-controlled - not so much focused on the "self" but rather focused on being able to live in a right way. It is the fruit or working of the Holy Spirit in our lives (Gal 5:22-23) and is a gift from God (Titus 2:11-12) rather than us controlling ourselves by sheer will or effort.
• Respectable - a view that others have of us as being good. In verse 7 he describes it as a "good reputation with outsiders." So how do coworkers or neighbors view you? Kind or mean? Hypocritical or honorable?
• Hospitable - A practical demonstration of helping/loving those who aren't a part of your family.
• Able to teach - This requires both patience with those who don't understand, but also a clear understanding that enables you to describe things in ways that others can understand.
• Not given to drunkenness - Like temperate - showing restraint and moderation - but specifically in the area of alcohol since this obviously can be an area of problem.
• Not violent but gentle - How do you act toward your children, co-workers, wife, others - especially when they frustrate you?! Quite a challenge!
• Not quarrelsome - Sometimes Christians want to be "right" instead of show the love of Christ. Jesus didn't argue or quarrel. He told the truth in love. I like how Paul says our speech should be full of grace and seasoned with salt (Col 4:6). Sometimes we are full of salt and seasoned with grace :(
• Not a lover of money - Another area of temptation. Jesus spoke a lot about money and said that our heart will be where our treasure is (Matt 6:21). If our treasure is money and material wealth, then our heart will be there instead of loving God. True treasure is that which is eternal - God and people - the two things we are to love.
• Manage his own family well - Partially related to relationships with children and wife and partially related to the practical aspects of managing a family - finances, responsibilities
• Children obey him - But not when done with an iron fist or a terror-based obedience. But rather as God loves us and calls us to follow and obey. There is discipline involved, but mercy triumphs over judgement (Jas 2:13). It is God's love and kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).

Who is worthy of such regard?! Our only hope is that it is Jesus who changes and works in us (Phil 2:13). Thanks be to Jesus who continues to lead us, change us and shape us in his glorious image! Jesus I need your help!